The Mama Award

  So, in honor of Mother’s Day I thought I would tell the story of the Mama award.  It has been dormant for some time now and I think it’s time to revive the tradition. 

  Ask yourself who has been influential in your life.  Is there a woman in your past who has been a mentor, confidant, teacher or friend to you?  She doesn’t have to be related to you at all.  She simply has to have had an impact on your life and its development.  Let’s face it, mothers are invaluable to all of us and not just the ones in our immediate family but all the mamas who helped raise us and shape our lives. 

  When I was a teenager I would spend long days and even longer nights with wonderful friends who were awesome just to be around.  We would laugh and play and be goofy all the time, especially during the summer months when 3 and 4 in the morning were the normal bedtimes for us.  I don’t remember ever feeling unwelcome in any of my friends’ homes during that time, even that late at night and a lot of it had to do with the quality of parents each of my friends had. 

  Now, it wasn’t always the case, but sometimes when you befriend someone you also take that persons mama to friend as well and just by sheer association they have an impact on you.  Now that I look back, each of these wonderful mothers was making sure that we as teenagers always had a safe-haven to go to, even at 2:00 in the morning, where we would always be welcome.  We never had to worry about outside influences or the teenage tendency to find mischief late at night because we had these different places to go.  We would rotate the location of these gatherings regularly, but we were always cared for and always safe because of the homes provided by these different families and, most especially, these wonderful mothers.  Now, I am not talking about 3 or 4 kids…  I mean a group of about 15-20 kids. 

  Once when we were over at my friend’s house on a Friday night, I said something to someone referring to my friend’s mother and simply called her “Mama Doxy.”  Several nights later we were over at another friend’s house and I referred to his mother as “Mama Buckner.”  It kind of grew out of that, as most good ideas do, and turned into what it is today.  Now, I have certificates and plaques that can be presented to different mamas in recognition of who and what they have been to me.

  Traditionally in German culture there are two ways of addressing people.  There is the “sie sprache” which is the formal way of addressing someone and there is the “du sprache” the informal or intimate way of addressing someone.  You would always use the sie sprache with people above your station like your boss or an older acquaintance but you would also use it when addressing your equals, i.e. your colleagues at work, your casual acquaintances, people you are meeting for the first time.  The du sprache, or the intimate form of address was reserved for dear close friends, little children, family and, wonderfully, when addressing God in your personal prayers.  According to German tradition, when you had known someone long enough and you had developed a bond of friendship, you would meet at a tavern, you would get several rounds of schnapps, you would toast each other’s health and would agree to use the du sprache from then on.  After that, you were friends for life. 

  The Mama Award is similar to this idea.  When a particular mother shows herself to be of the kind of quality as to be influential in guiding your young life, caring about you, worrying about you, advising you, holding you accountable, raising you, teaching you… When a woman has done this and you take a moment to recognize it, you agree to drop the “Mrs.” or the “ma’am” and just call her “Mama.”  It doesn’t matter what age she is.  It doesn’t matter if she has kids of her own or not.  She becomes another mother to you and you honor her with the title of mama. 

  They say it takes a village to raise a child.  In many ways this has always been true.  So, I invite you to take a moment and honor your mother.  But also pay homage to all the “mamas” in your life, as well. 

Happy Mother’s Day!