What is it about being involved with a group of people and experiencing things together with them that creates a bond? We've all heard the term "brothers in arms" before, right? Someone who was there. Someone who "gets it." This can also very well apply to two strangers who fought in the same war whether literal or figurative. Or it can just be a group brought together by chance or a common interest.
Two examples come to mind. First is the experience I had working through a divorce at the same time as my brother and two other friends. We all saw first hand the war that can be waged between spouses. Whether it's a cold war or all out nuclear annihilation, we saw it. The same comradery exists, however, between myself and a guy I just met for the first time who, I found out, was also going through the struggle of divorce. We bonded as though we were long time friends. Why does that happen? It's interesting to me that there seems to be this universal club that people can be a part of just for having gone through the misery it took to understand the mindset of those who are a part of that group. So, if you encounter someone who has had similar experiences to your own, give them a hi five and make that connection. It can be rather rewarding if you let it.
The second example that comes to mind is less profound but seemingly far more potent. I have been participating in a theatrical production which has a rather large cast of players. We have nearly completed a run of 58 shows together and though I am exhausted from the run, I will be sorry to see it end. I seem to be spending more time with these marvelous people than I do with members of my own family, and I prefer it that way. Each person so dynamic and so diverse. Each one a puzzle to figure out how to unlock and understand. I can imagine that each of these people are so different for me, had we not shared a love of theater we should never have met in a hundred years, much less had a conversation. One person is a lawyer, one a dancer, one a retail clerk, one a network administrator, one a reputation manager, one an engineer, one a student studying Arabic. We were so different when we first came together it was difficult to imagine ever coming to know these odd and fascinating people. Now, at the end, I can hardly imagine NOT sharing my evenings with these wonderful friends.
I suppose a quote is appropriate here. "Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Others stay a while and leave footprints on our hearts and we are never, ever the same."
--Ralph Waldo Emerson.
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